Sealing Wax and Sailing Ships

As the Walrus said...
Its my last night in Australia and it seems to have come round quite quickly. The training is finished so i have done my last day in the little hut at the abandoned airport. Essendon is a strange place - its size suggests that once it was a thriving travel centre, a flurry of DC3s, Electras and the odd 727 which whisked the good people of Victoria off to exciting places with stupid names - Wangaratta, Ballarat, Mangalore, Mallacoota and Wycheproof (and thats just in the same state). Now it lies hauntingly empty, with a check in desk at one end of the 300 foot long building, a tea hut in the middle and nothing at the other end. There are closed shops in the middle of the concourse creating little alley ways a bit like Melbourne itself, but they never open and no one ever comes to try them. It wouldnt surprise you if Scooby and Shaggy came running round the corner shouting "Yoiks" pursued by a gnarled old cleaner who doesnt want the developpers to move in...
And communication is at a minimum to say the least. The only internet site i can access is webmail - and the guys are telling me that emails are taking 12 hours to arrive. I can phone from English mobile to English mobile (there is no landline) but there is a huge echo and delay that isnt normally there, and it probably costs a bailout every minute.
So back to the hotel where i discover that checkout tomorrow is 11am.. This will need some planning as my flight is at 2359, and i am supposed to do an office day in there somewhere... They will let me use the gym as a bathroom - i assume there is a changing room or something and they are not just encouraging me to pee on the treadmill??? - so i guess i'm preparing for a 24 hour flight in a gym changing room?
I have enjoyed Melbourne, its been a warm, welcoming place, and i have certainly shouted at fewer people this week for gross incompetence. No apologies to the taxi firm who managed in 14 bookings to produce 4 no shows and 8 late taxis - 2 on time! Today both turned up half an hour early with DO NOT BE LATE written in marker pen on their trip sheets. Just cos i ripped into the boss yesterday and reminded him we spend all day with the guys who choose which taxi company to ring... And no apologies to the barista in the fancy coffee shop who responded to my request for a coffee and sparkling water by telling me to sit down. So i did. 10 minutes later I returned to the bar and asked if i could have my drinks. He said yes, sit down. 10 minutes later i was brought a coffee. I followed him back to the counter and asked if i could also have my sparkling water. In an act of genius he wandered off to my table and collected the coffee. He then took it to his boss, told him the customer wanted coffee and sparkling water, and how much should he add... It was gently pointed out to him that they go in separate glasses. So he took a bottle of water off the shelf and handed it to me. It was warmer than the coffee. I cut my losses and left. Other than that i have had to do remarkably little educating of the unwashed masses, which is good as i needed a break. Maybe they are learning and teaching each other....
So, a shame to leave this wonderful town, but its a lovely feeling to be on the way home. My baby has had to deal with broken cars, broken roads, broken bathrooms, children, work and dirty dogs. And she needs a little break, so its good to be going home to see her again. Will be wonderful to catch up, light the fire, watch the dogs wrestle and hear the cat miaow. Its the best destination there could possibly be, so i dont care how long the flight is, i dont care if i dont get business. I'm going to see my woman!